Watching all the little kids running around at this public square in a summer evening, I was thinking to myself, "boy, that's a lot of kids. And each one of them came from a man and a woman, and they had to have sex at some point to make this happen, and that moment was supposed to be a time they were so attracted to each other and trusted each other that especially the woman was willing to bear the seed so to make this baby." But then looking at the couples around the kids, I couldn't help wondering how could the guy be attractive to the girl, and vice versa. I mean, many of them don't look that match. But somehow, the woman liked the guy, and the guy liked the woman. Well, I suppose there was love, or there is love, at least at the moment of the sex.

    So if I look at the guys (and most of the women), they are not that attractive at all. Especially for the guys, many of them look really crappy, no athletic build, no manly atmosphere, no intelligence in the eyes, staring at his mobile phone like a zombie, nearly indifferent to his wife and his kid(s), and no interest to the activities around him. The women are slightly better. But many of them dressed poorly, too, I should say dressed with a poor (strange) taste to my eyes. And they usually sit with their mom who played the role of a babysitter. I couldn't sense the passion between the two people anymore, they don't touch, they don't hold hands, they don't walk side by side, they don't necessarily talk. They hang out together, stroll together, usually with at least one of them married to the stupid smart phone. Isn't this sad!?

    However, the women didn't look sad. They looked quite content. So they are satisfied with the setup, the husband, the kid, the life? I couldn't tell. One thing strikes me is that since they accepted the guy to bear a child, the guy was quite acceptable. Therefore, the urban legend and social trend of women having trouble to find a mate really has nothing to do with girls being picky then. Girls are not picky, and these running kids are the running proofs. The picky girls are themselves choosing to stay away from these guys because the guys don't have the qualities they are looking for. I think these are the smart ones, really, because if you ever pay a slightest attention to these guys, they really don't have much to offer, well, besides his bio organ and his billion sperms.

    I don't know. I'm confused. I don't know these people so I shouldn't judge a book by its cover. The guys might be a sweet lover and a romantic angel and a sex machine and a millionaire and... and the woman might be a simple-minded female whose ideal is to have a family, a kid, a husband on paper or who smoke or spit on the floor or eating with pia pia sound or a crappy observation of life or .... I don't know. They liked each other, that's what matters. Now they have kids, and they are still together. Isn't this reality better than any of my imagined happy life? Isn't it just the happy life I am imagining and longing to have? This is truly confusing.

    The legend has that girls are beautiful, delicate, and always trying to pick the best out of all guys she has. They are wonderful beings that deserve all the care, attention and love to cherish them. So guys continuously strive to become his best so not to disappoint his girl. However, watching all these kids around, I couldn't help feeling that girls are not aiming high at all. On the contrary they aim pretty low, and they are willing to have a kid with a guy without any of these legendary attachments involved. She has a passionate night, gets a baby, then settles with the guy regardless of all her so called standards. They are irrelevant now. And whoever get her at the moment, becomes the lucky guy.

    Is this how girls love? If so, this is really really really sad.

    — by Feng Xia


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