So Noah's school called yesterday. During lunch the kids at his table played truth or dare. Noah dared, a girl, to rape..... geee.. I was totally speechless and didn't even understand where he could have picked up that concept. Teacher said she felt this is a topic she should leave to parents to talk him about... so he and I had a talk on the way to Kumon.

    The good things is that he admitted he said so, not like before that he would try to get out of it by denying or finding other excuses like "but the other kid started it". So where did he get that idea? He said I told him that!!.. what!? How? where? .. "you remember the movie we watched yesterday?" "which movie!?" "The Japanese samurai movie." "Samurai movie?.... oh, you mean, the one in which that guy killed someone for a girl, and he then attacked that girl?...." "yes"

    Oh mine mine.... so he is referring to this movie — Satan's Sword: The Dragon God (1960)- Raizō Ichikawa, in which a young Samurai was traveling, and met a girl who fell in love with him. She had a pursuer who was rather a psycho. He hired a rouge who owned a gun to ambush this samurai on his way, and abducted her to a hideout. The rouge, however, wanted to attacked the girl. By being still in love with her, well, that was the intention to begin with, right, so he got in a fight with this rouge, and ended up killing. The girl tried to run away when they were fighting, but failed to escape. He then sexually assaulted her, and that's when I presumably told Noah about "rape".. actually I asked him what this word means, and he said it means "sexually assault". "Well, then, is it good or bad?" "Bad." "Correct, any assault is bad, sexually assault is especially bad."

    But what got me thinking, is that out of the entire movie of so many good things one can learn — bravery, loyalty, love, courage, nobility, aesthetic, curiosity of what a daily life was like back in 12th century Japan... out of all these, one thing he learned, and came to him mind, was this, "rape"!... how could this be!!!? why!?

    You know. See, everyone grows up eventually, everyone learns about concept of these words, eventually. There is no denial that somehow one figures it out, same as sexual education, same probably for anything else, life in general, that you will learn the truth of life, truth of reality, and how pleasant and unpleasant it actually is, and what is important, and what is just flashy and superficial.

    Therefore, one needs to know about these bad words, and it is unrealistic to expect one knows how to use it properly on day 1 as soon as one learned about it, isn't it? Of course I'm not encourage such behavior at all. As a matter of fact, I'm totally appalled by a phone call like this. But it is part of a growing pain I'm afraid, for both me and Noah.

    This always makes me wonder why human mind, as a clean sheet as a kid's, will be attracted/impressed more by these, in our eyes, bad things, than those, again in our eyes, the good things!? Is it by nature that taboo is more attractive and exciting, thus leaving a stronger impression in memory, thus making it more likely to pop up in this type of events when he was easily carried away? What is it that makes these "fun", for him, but totally not acceptable by our social standard by any dimension?

    I don't know. I think I'm going down the path of generalization myself now, and am using the word "any" a lot in this discussion, which, by my own statement last weekend, can not be true, should not be true, and is just bogus, because any must speak for a generalization which can not stand a test in logic ← what do you mean by any!? you only need one single counter example to defeat such generalization. But then, there is these things, such as sexual assault, which is bad bad bad, in any case, by any standard, and at any time... so there I have it, an ANY-case, that, is always bad.

    So you can try to fish out a counter example for the sake of argument. But I think once it comes to a judgment, because it is entirely and solely subjective, it becomes irrelevant whether it is a generalization → I think it is wrong, therefore it is wrong.

    But the reverse is true, also → I think it is right, therefore it is right. What this means? That there isn't such a thing as being objective? that there isn't a thing called truth? or fact? Even if they exist, what role do they play in your judgment/conclusion? Isn't it still your subjective decision to take them or leave them? to believe them or disregard them? If so, what's the point anymore to dig up truth? and isn't the version of truth also a product of the writer's or the investigator's conclusion, thus is also subjective!?

    This can't be good. But I don't see a way out of this strange loop. A sunny day today. Life is indeed, strange.

    — by Feng Xia

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